Separation can be hard on both sides when it occurs. It can be highly stressful and can be awkward when you have to speak to your previous partner, especially when children are involved. This helpful guide will give you the best tips on how to best communicate when you’ve separated.

1. Mind Your Tone Of Voice

The words you say are just as powerful as how you say them. The tone of your voice will determine whether your pervious partner will feel attacked or safe in your presence. When speaking be mindful of how your tone is. Stop yourself if you start to become irritated and make statements that can come across as accusations. Try to avoid a condescending tone as this will cause more arguments and resentment when you have to meet or communicate with one another again at a later time.

2. Listen To Each Other

It’s important when communicating with your previous partner that you listen to what they’re saying and don’t interrupt. Once they’re finished then you can talk. This is to be done for both couples. Listening and waiting your turn is crucial to good communication and can lead to a much calmer resolve to problems you may be addressing.

3. Keep Your Emotions In Check

While emotions may be high when you’re around your previous partner, it’s important to try to keep them in check as best as possible. Even if they’re getting angry and trying to pull you down, remember you don’t have to act the way they’re hoping you will. Instead stop, let them finish, and continue on with the topic you’re trying to talk about. Giving into your emotions and also getting angry and defensive isn’t going to help the situation. Giving no reaction to smart comments is much more powerful than getting emotional.

4. Request Feedback

When communicating with one another, request feedback. This can be something along the lines of ‘does this make sense?’ or ‘do you understand what I’m talking about?’. Requesting feedback can help to keep everyone on the same page when decisions have to be made.

5. Stay On Point

If you’re meeting to discuss a specific topic, it’s important to keep on point with the conversation. Straying from the conversation topic can result in an argument or fight. Be direct, to the point, and keep on topic.

Communication with a previous partner can be hard, however it’s important to stay calm, keep your emotions in check and keep to the point of why you’re talking in the first place. Try not to stray off topic too much.